Exhaustion.

 My night ended late last night, after teaching, with my own personal practice, thanks to YogaGlo. I'm already a big fan, and have explored everything from Ashtanga, to vinyasa, to meditation to yin classes. I'm still in my free trial, but I am loving the diversity of the practices and the teachers and I will definitely be sticking with the subscription. In weeks like these where I am on my own all week and kids practices take up my evening hours, this is perfect for me. It gives me a wealth of places to draw ideas for my own classes, as well as a place to go when simply playing on my mat leaves me usually winding down my practice after 20 minutes or so. I've done a full 4 hours of at home practice this week, which is a lot for me! I also had some fun finding a new class I love at the gym, and getting in a good weight and cardio workout. It was super wet MT and W, and very windy today, so I found myself in the gym all three days. Tomorrow promises better weather, so I hope to get in a short run before my class with my mentor, I need to log some outside time.  To unwind my tired back and shoulders I scheduled a 90 minute deep tissue massage for tomorrow afternoon. Another element of self care that went overlooked over the summer was massage, and I've been taking advantage of the school year to get back to it. It feels like a way of saying "Thank you" to your body, allowing yourself to just give in as you lay there, your mind to relax and everything to just settle down for 90 minutes in a soothing, quiet environment. Tomorrow night is a real treat, Sue and I are taking a workshop together with the wild and crazy (Opera singing!) Natalie Levine at Brandywine Yoga.  I'm really looking forward to it as a sweet unwinding down from a busy week.

Up before sunrise today (doesn't it look a bit like alligators across the sky?) to get everyone off properly before I spend the day at the food cupboard. I think I've worked out how best to most efficiently run the kids food/funds drive with some help from the other volunteers, and I spent some time at Staples picking up supplies to get the kids involved in the neighborhood food drive portion. 

Today I physically moved over 3,000 lbs of food (this was just one van load, we did two) over to a warehouse someone has generously donated. Again, storage is our biggest problem. This is all food that has come in in food drives ~ NONE of these canned goods have even been date checked or sorted yet. We had to move them all out of the donation bags, into bins, load the van, move them to the warehouse, and repeat. It was backbreaking work, I feel like I didn't take a breath all day. That said it is invigorating to see space free up, all while intaking new donations. It's simply amazing how much manpower it takes ~ constantly moving food in, desperate to get the things that need to go out right away out, the fresh stuff on the shelves, produce bought when we need it, dairy out, and all the while serving clients. I'm going to start going in more days a week to do all of the sorting and dating that needs to be done, the need just seems endless right now. When I start thinking about Christmas I panic a little bit, throw in the fact that the kids games and meets all start up this weekend and it is a bit anxiety provoking…….but I am just chipping away at it one bit at a time. Deep breaths. I was tempted to sit down tonight and work at it……but I treated myself to a little Christmas present and bought the Amazon Unlimited Kindle subscription (ITS ON SALE ON AMAZON, GET IT, only $80 FOR THE YEAR, READERS!!!) and just downloaded a new book, so I'm off to bed to snuggle with my girl, whose night it is to have a sleepover with me. Speaking of anxiety. I had my one month check up with my Psychiatrist as it has been a month since I went on my new medication that has pulled me out of the depths. It was so nice to sit down and say "I LOVE THIS MEDICATION. THANK YOU". As he was cheerily flipping through my chart all pleased with himself he said ~ OH! here is something interesting. You are on "blah blah" (insert name of my BCP which seems to constantly change as I'm on the generic". "Yes, I said". "Oh", he said, "I got a notice that the dose of xyz med that you are on (and I have been on for three years, though we recently upped it 100 mg trying to help me) can interfere with your low estrogen BCP's effectiveness at that dose".

I NEARLY LEAPT OUT OF MY CHAIR.

This is not an "OH, here is something interesting" kind of comment! This is like a 911 pager to MELISSA IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT KIND OF PHONE CALL FROM THE PHARMACIST OR THE PSYCHIATRIST OR ANYONE.

NOT AN "OH!"

So? So I'm technically maybe not protected by my BCP. Okayyyyy. So of course for the past 24 hours I've been doing all that crazy stuff that Mom's know all about, like squeezing my boobs (DO they hurt? Am I HAVING CRAZY DREAMS? Wait, ARE THOSE IMPLANTATION CRAMPS? DID I HAVE INSOMNIA LAST NIGHT? and laying in shavasana last night blowing by belly up big (like any mom of multiple kids can do, its a real gift :) and holding my belly thinking WTF, what the actual F would this be like again?????????)

So of course I went google crazy and it seems like the odds are very impossibly low so I talked myself back off the cliff and stopped squeezing myself inappropriately…..but jeez. Shouldn't the pharmacist tell you that stuff? Between Jake's near death and my broken hip and my depression they know me pretty intimately at this point, I mean, I know their kids names and stuff. Never a "Hey girl! Watch that baby maker on this stuff!".

So anyway. Remember to check your drug interactions if you take drugs. Because nobody needs THAT just when you are feeling all cheery and frisky and happy again.

PSA for the day.

Cheers!