Putting on costumes.

This was the family a year ago for Moms hoedown 60th birthday bash. 

Yesterday I felt unsettled.. In registering with Yoga Alliance a new and mandatory step in the process is that we have to rate our yoga school and have the option of providing written feedback. The truth is, I didn't love my school. The person who runs it has gotten lazy, the program hasn't changed in 15 years, her comings and goings often changed based on her Husbands football coaching schedule, she didnt vet in anyway who she allowed into the program (which meant quite frankly that there was one completely crazy person and one person who didnt know how to do yoga. Now, why take someones good money under the premise that you can teach them to become a yoga teacher if you simply can't deliver on that promise because they aren't even qualified to start? There were some basic amenities missing (no fridge to put our food in and there were no lunch breaks on our long 9:30-4:30 days. Some of the presenters (the Iyengar person in particular) were terrible. She was mean. Who's mean in yoga? 

Anyway. I was honest in my review. It says in very big bold letters that all response are NON anonymous ~ so I chose my words very carefully. I'm grateful for my certification, I'm grateful for the great friendships that I made, but I do think that the program needs an overhaul. I also think that the leader needs to reevaluate her ability to teach without having favorites ~ she was downright dismissive of and mean to some of the less talented and the one crazy person in her class. There was a lot of frustration amongst the group as the weeks went on ~ mostly surrounding the lack of time we had to practice teach during the program. There was a general consensus that without our mentors, that none of us would be qualified to teach. The mentoring program is not technically part of the school, its something that Sue started and is voluntary, not mandatory. Everyone has been talking about how they were going to rate the school honestly, because they thought that the rating was anonymous. 

So when I wrote my assessment I was honest, even though I knew my name was going to be directly attached to my ranking and my comments. I rated the school based upon what I felt the school itself prepared me for teaching wise. I then in the comments stated that the best part of the school was the mentoring program. I mentioned Sue by name and said how the countless hours of 1:1 time that she spent with me were what prepared me to teach. I mentioned how her encouragement to go find a job BEFORE school ended was what had me working with two jobs by graduation, I wouldn't have had the courage to do that, nor would I have known that I could based just upon knowledge gleaned from school. So, long story short, I'm hearing that most of my classmates, even the ones who complained the most bitterly, are giving the school a 5/5. And there is me, at a 2.5/5. Apparently the owner is in a tizzy about it. Do they think that she is going to hire them if they lie for her? I just think that its a shame that we have this vehicle to spur change and to improve the school for students who come behind us and people aren't courageous enough to use it! 

It was just a long day yesterday. I went to dance party with my Mom, but forgot that it was at 9:30 and got there too early, so did 40 minutes of easy stairs first. Had a quick bite in the cafe, she took middle and smalls to the park while I went to the Y to sub a class. We met up back at her house and I brought everyone home for naps. We had a nice afternoon outside and got packed for the weekend trip to the Poconos, and then Amber came after dinner so that I could run a couple of errands and go to the Inversion class. Today is 8:30 yoga, 12:30 golf with 3 friends, and finally, FINALLY Nate gets home. We can have one family dinner and then jump in the car and go. Maybe I'm just weary. Maybe I'm just over thinking this whole thing. I just get so down about women who can't speak their mind in truth. It drives me crazy. I keep telling myself that only my actions matter….that I can be proud that I spoke my truth with integrity and honest constructive criticism with no intent to hurt, I chose my words intentionally and gently. I have to stop there. I can't worry about what other people said or why. I can't worry about feeling left hung out to dry. Thats hard for me. Working on it. 

Happy friday, all.