Another Saturday at the ball field

But his study, just completed, found that greater parental spending is associated with lower levels of young-athlete enjoyment and motivation. "When parental sports spending goes up, it increases the likelihood either that the child will feel pressure or that the parent will exert it," says Dr. Dorsch, a Utah State University professor and former professional football player.

The study adds to a small but growing body of research suggesting that parents ought to temper their investments in youth athletics. The problem, at root, isn't financial: It is that big expenditures tend to elevate parental expectations. "The more parents do, the more they expect a return on their investment," possibly reducing their chances of a favorable outcome, says Daniel Gould, director of Michigan State University's Institute for the Study of Youth Sports.

Yesterday was another beautiful morning spent at the baseball field watching Luke play. Friday night was fun, we went to my parents house for homemade pizza along with my sister (who is due in about 3 weeks with her second sweet baby) and my niece. My BIL is also away on a golf trip, so it was perfect timing for a family night sans husbands. The kids love pajama nights at Mom Mom and Pop Pops and so do I. We were up and at the field early for Luke's game on Saturday. He is 7, so it's coach pitch this year, but the 8 year olds on the team are starting to pitch. It's so much more fun to watch than T ball was, as its turning into actual baseball at this point and the kids really are starting to know what they are doing. My parents came to the game, and Julia ended up going home with them for the day. We did a massive fruit and vegetable haul and went home for lunch. Our sitter got to the house at 1, and I was off for a beautiful afternoon of golf with Janice and Eileen. Its so much fun playing with different people and hearing everyones different tips for course management and reading the greens and whatnot. The Preakness went off (do we have a triple crown winner this year?!?!?!?) while we had our shrimp cocktail and we ate our grilled chicken kabobs on the deck. Our view from our deck (above) is priceless. That said, I'm starting to be afraid that it could be threatened, as our neighbor who owns the farm and field is now 90. He has 5 kids, and I'm afraid that if he passes away the field (it's 7 acres) could potentially be subdivided and developed into a couple of houses. That would completely change the feel of our house. I've actually contacted our realtor and am now *gently* starting to look at houses…….but everything I look at just bums be out because I love our home and even going up a good bit in price I wouldn't trade what I'm seeing for our home. Its all good as there is certainly no rush to move and it would be a gigantic pain in the ass (especially as it hasn't even been quite a year since we finished the basement) but, we are tentatively looking in case the perfect place comes along. It feels like Nate is back in school, we haven't had a weekend without him since he was in his MBA program…….I had forgotten how those weekends were kind of relaxing in a nice way. The kids are just fun and easy to be around at these ages and we are keeping the weekend low key and family oriented. Nate is having a blast and played great yesterday. He had the kids mark all of his golf balls and the Julia marked balls seem to be his lucky ones (no surprise, as Julia is far and away the lucky one in the family, winning pretty much every pool/bet/bracket). I can't wait to see his pictures when he gets home. Today after I teach my second class we are spending the afternoon hiking at Tyler Arboretum with Becky and kids, as her husband Brian is on the trip with Nate. 

I loved this article from the journal this week. I saved it and am going to pull it out as needed in the coming years. We live in such a competitive area. Everyone redshirts their kids, for academic, social, athletic reasons etc. I actually went to school with a kid (a good friend) who did 9th grade with me and didn't play baseball (to preserve the year of eligibility), but worked with a private coach for the entire year and then changed schools to a very expensive private school where he REPEATED 9th grade just for baseball. His parents were willing to pay a private coach for a year, pay $100K in tuition, and have their son redo an entire year of schoolwork….in hopes of? Div I baseball? A scholarship? (I'm no genius but the math on that seems dubious). Major League ball? And that was 25 years ago. Its only gotten worse around here. I feel like this pressure is something that is constantly confronting us…..in every arena, not just athletics. Talking to a acquaintance about summer camps at the Rugby banquet last week she was talking about the Eagles and Phillies camps that her two sons are going to this summer…..the Eagles camp is $500 for the week and the Phillies one is $1000! Eh? No. I'm all for giving my kids experiences and wanting them to have a great and full life……but this stuff is just ridiculous. For a second though its like ~ SHIT, am I holding them back? Are they going to be "behind" because they aren't doing lacrosse camps all summer? Because they don't have a tennis coach? Because they aren't getting private hitting coaching for baseball? Not because I'm competitive, but because when EVERYONE is doing it you start to feel like you missed the bus on some memo you were supposed to have gotten, and you are somehow shortchanging your kid. Reading actual statistical evidence that our guts are right on this one is so edifying. Nate and I both played college sports. My parents encouraged but never pushed me. Nate was the 4th boy in his family ~ his parents never did anything "special" and certainly never did anything expensive and he played college sports and the highest non pro division of Rugby in the US. It will be okay. I'm tired of people telling me what I have to do. I actually had someone tell me that if my kids didn't have video games at home they would feel left out when they went to other kids houses because they wouldn't know how to play them, so we really were doing our kids a disservice by not having them. That is stupid. I had someone on line tell me that I was full of shit when I said that Luke requested salmon, brussel sprouts and sweet potatoes for his birthday dinner, because "everyone" knows that no 6 year old would request that. Okay. I'm so grateful to not be, and never want to be "everyone". 

People are so freaking weird. Our kids can't like salmon, have to play video games, and need $1000/week sports camps and private coaches.  With thought processes like that its little wonder most of the world is overweight, in debt, and sedentary. Shit.